This is my sixth Gift Team trip and tenth time visiting an unwed mother's shelter. Why do I even try to fool myself into thinking this time around it will be different and I won't get h. I'll take the low road and blame the other people that are with me, they are the ones that start to cry so of course, I cry!
The same questions are asked over and over on each trip so you would think I would be used to the drill. Yesterday, when we went to the shelter, we started off with the tour and then created our own pottery out of clay. That was a lot of fun and everyone seemed to have a great time with it. So with this type of atmosphere, things should be pretty mellow. Wrong. Once the Q & A begins, the tears begin.
I am a very strong advocate for adoption, but I will not tell any other woman what her decision should be. This is a life long decision that this mother has to live with. I'm only grateful that my birth mother made the decision that she did, whether she gave me up willingly or not so willingly. I am here today because of her and I love her for giving me life. I feel the same way about my daughter's birth mother. I hope I can do her proud raising this beautiful girl and give her every opportunity I possibly can.
These types of visits tend to drain me emotionally, which then leads to me being tired physically. After getting back to the hotel, we went shopping then I had a late dinner of Korean fried chicken. Yes, I am addicted to this chicken!! But being so tired and worn out, I was physically getting sick. I could feel my sinuses hurting and then my top molars began to hurt...a clear sign that I was or have a sinus infection. I told hubby that during our video chat...not something he wanted to hear, but I needed him to call my doctor to have a Rx ready for me for when I get home on Saturday.
But today, I wasn't in pain anymore! My sinus finally unplugged and wasn't hurting and my teeth weren't hurting either. I took it easy in the morning tho and stayed in bed til the very last minute before getting ready for the day. I didn't eat breakfast which I broke the cardinal rule of eat every meal this trip for energy!! But I did fine today. So onto what happened today...
Today was our trip to Ilsan to tour and host a Christmas party for the 300 residents living there. I just love Ilsan, it has this atmosphere for me of 'coming home' and I wasn't even at Ilsan as a child. But there's just something about the family atmosphere and everyone working together to help each resident become a better version of who they are. I feel so blessed every time I see the staff and caregivers, without them, Ilsan would not be possible.
The Christmas party was held in the chapel rather than in the gym because of the snowy conditions makes it more difficult to get some of the residents to the gym. It was different but our team members were scattered amongst the residents rather than all of us at a head table. It was nice being right with them and share in festivities. It's amazing that all the faults I see in myself, I can push aside and tell myself how blessed I am and just be me. Maybe that's why I was able to sing my part of the song without hesitation. No judging goes on at Ilsan, we are all family there. Ilsan is home for everyone.
1 comment:
Aw, I finally had time to read this and now I'm teary. I really like your statement, "Ilsan is home to everyone." That is so insightful and does, perhaps, explain that feeling we get while we're there. Thank you for sharing.
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