My Name is Life

My Weaknesses Became My Strengths

This book changed my life at a time when I was just beginning to see my potential and made my self-discovery a more positive journey:

I hadn't thought of myself as needing this book since I was 'just a stay at home mom' and not a career woman. 2005 was the year I traveled to Korea for the first time. I came back with a sense of what my heritage was, it was a part of me no matter how hard I tried denying it. I traveled to Korea two months later. I came back with even more of who I was and who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do with my life.

My church was offering this course so I signed up. My hubby decided to go with me only because he was having a horrible week at work, maybe this would change things for him too. We both took the class, did the homework and came out of it with a sense of who we truly are. Instead of looking for our weaknesses, we were to look at our strengths and see what the top five were.

Reading what my top five strengths were really opened up my world for me. I gained a sense of confidence I hadn't had. I gained a sense of who I wanted to be and how I wanted to live my life. I always thought I was a positive person, but this cemented it. From this point forward, I would look at life with an even more positive attitude and my path in life revealed itself in front of me. I haven't looked back since.

Six years later, my life is so full and rich all because I stepped out of my comfort zone and took this course at church. God truly knows how to lead the way!

Becoming Korean

Yes, I'm Korean, but for a very long time, I never wanted to admit it, face it, be it. That has changed over the years, but trust me, it took me a long time to come to terms with it. When i was young, I already knew I was different. I knew I was adopted, I knew I didn't look like everyone else.

I was a happy kid though. I felt like I was just like everyone else. I even saw myself as being a normal, everyday American kid, size and all. I knew I was short, but I didn't see myself as being really short. I was always told that I was so petite. I just saw that as everyone calling me short. I thought I wore size medium and larges like some of my friends. It took me until well into my 40's to finally buy clothes in size small.

So now here I am, almost 44 and I am truly comfortable in my own Korean skin. I love seeing my name written in hangul: 김 미 승 that is my Korean given name, Kim Mi Sung. I love being around other Koreans, I love kimchee and have actually brought it into my home more and more, much to the disgust of my entire family. Oh well, they can get used it to it because I am having kimchee as much as possible.

I have a lot of pottery from Korea and will continue to buy more. Each trip I have brought home pottery, love looking at it daily in my home.

The one area that I will not be full Korean is learning to speak Korean. My brain just doesn't work that way and I'm very comfortable with not knowing how to speak Korean even in Korea. I proudly tell everyone in Korea that I only speak English and though they are surprised, they have embraced me with open arms.

Becoming Korean has been fun, becoming who I truly am has been an amazing journey.

Spring..

A time of renewal, rebirth, reflection. I love spring. Having been gone a week, coming back and seeing the green grass, the flower beds renewed with green growth, it was and is a beautiful sight. When I look outside my windows and see the new growth, I see myself and how I continue to grow as a person.

I continue to grow and mature as a person, both professionally for my board meetings and personally as an individual. The 55th anniversary celebration was a time of renewal and rebirth for me as I look at who I am, what I am doing with my life, and how I can continue to carry out God's plan for me.

Meeting adoptees from all over the world always refreshes me. I'm amazed at how we come together and make an instant connection. I see the similarities, the differences in all of us, yet we have this one connection. I see the need for all of us to get together, share in our stories, share in our efforts for one another and for those that will come after us. This renews the hope in me that I am making a difference, not only for myself, but for others. I am on the right path, I am strengthened each time I am at one of these events to continue forth in my mission.

Connections

As we go thru life, we come across people from all over. I'm lucky enough to be able to meet people from all over the world. Why is it that I'm always amazed at these chance meetings, or are they chance meetings? For me, these are not chance meetings. God puts me in places where I was meant to be, to meet people I was meant to meet. His timing is always great.

I get a sense of renewal, a sense of hope, a sense of life. I was in D.C. last week and the latter part of the week was to celebrate Holt International's 55th anniversary. I can't believe it was just six years ago that my life completely changed and for the better. I had made my very first trip back to Korea to celebrate Holt Korea's 50th anniversary, then to Eugene, Oregon to celebrate Holt International's 50th anniversary, then join Holt International's Board of Directors. What a whirlwind!

So here I was, in Washington, D.C. to celebrate Holt's 55th anniversary. I met so many amazing people that have a heart for the children of the world. I met more adoptees from all over the world. But I had forgotten that for some of these adoptees, this was their first time ever to be around other adoptees. I remember my first time meeting other adoptees. I was overwhelmed, I was in disbelief, I was so happy to meet others with this same connection. I felt so welcome, I felt a bond, I felt grateful.

When adoptees meet one another, there seems to be a feeling of oneness, a feeling of kinship, no matter where one resides. Sometimes, words didn't need to be spoken, looking at one another, we just knew what the feelings were. When we were in a group and one person was talking, you could see the rest of the group all nodding our heads in agreement, the common feelings sewing us together. This quilt of oneness, blanketing us, comforting us, bonding us. This is what it is all about for me, getting together, sharing, hoping, dreaming, bonding, and creating life-long friendships all over the world.

Honoring a Man with a Huge Heart for Our Children

What a Week!

After a two days of board meetings, we began the celebration of Holt International's 55th Anniversary. The day of the forum registration, I was asked to step in on the panel of adoptees at the National Press Club. Not knowing what I would say, I agreed to be on the panel. I am not a public speaker by nature, but I have been getting better and better. When I tell my story, I know I am not talking for my sake, but for the sake of the children that do not have a voice. I feel a sense of calm and speak from my heart. After the panel was done, I still had no idea what I said, but many in attendance said I did well.

Adult Adoptees Kick Off the International Forum at the National Press Club

I am still processing all that went on during this celebration and all the experiences I was able to have while in D.C. I'm so grateful to have had the opportunity to experience these moments. Being at the Senate Russell building was pretty amazing. Being in the Caucus room was like being a kid in a candy store. I was amazed at the room, the decor, the architecture, the grandness of it all and what has happened within those walls.

Adoptees and Adoption Advocates Become One Voice for Children in Washington D.C.

Commercials

It's true, I get hooked into buying things just because I saw the product on tv. I am not a tv shopping junky though, nothing wrong with doing that either, if you have it under control. Anyhoo...I have bought several things thinking it would make my life easier, make my skin softer, make my skin look flawless, make cooking easier, make house cleaning a breeze...and so on.

I am not one to be very high maintenance, self-proclaimed of course. I don't go to the salon, I don't get manicures or pedicures, I don't get massages, I just never got into doing any of those things.

But seriously, I needed help for my darn cracked heels. I wear flip flops most of the time when going out, but am barefoot the majority of the time. So, first thing I buy, foot cream to help with the dry cracked heels that will instantly make them smooth and touchable...wrong! The next thing I buy is the foot scrubber thingy that should buff away all that nasty scaly skin...wrong! Lotion after lotion didn't work. So let's try the Ped Egg, sounds like what is truly needed and who wouldn't want to think of their heels as cheese and grate away at the dead, scaly skin? Truthfully, that darn thing hurts! It is a cheese grater! The nastiness that ends up inside that thing, GROSS! But I've kept up with it and lotioned some more...uh, my heels still aren't any better!!

My mind keeps racing for a solution, but seriously, this hasn't been my all consuming thought or priority, I really don't care about my heels being icky and scaly, but maybe I should care, it's not a pretty site. I like to think I am a good problem solver and a very practical thinker so it hit me, and of course, the first step is to admit it...the scaly skin is a form of athlete's foot. GROSS! I hate feet of any kind and to admit that I may have athlete's foot, ugh embarrassing. But it's not to the point of pain or true grossness, at least to me. So I go to Walgreen's and buy the wonderful athlete's foot cream. Something else written on the box, helps with jock itch, wonderful, I feel better already....NOT.

I have now applied the athlete's foot cream nightly and believe it or not, it's working!! For those that already knew about this solution, please just humor me that I figured it out. It's time to pull out the flip flops and cute sling back heels and show off my cute, little feet!!

Just When I'm All Set

The schedule changes. Why am I not used to this by now? Whatever activity my kids are involved in, there are always going to be changes occurring. I always think I am caught up, have the calendar set, then a schedule change happens. Not with just one kid, but both kids and updates galore. There are some people that still think my hubby and I have control over these changes...WE DON'T! We are at the mercy of waiting like everyone else for any change and some are very last minute.

I guess I get frustrated because I feel like I am very accommodating when it comes the changes, but others are not. Yes, I would like to be in control, but amazingly, I have become better with that too. Life is about being accommodating no matter the situation. So let's all take a deep breath and roll with the changes, even if they are last minute.