My Childhood

I had a very good childhood, it was full of family time, vacations, camping, spending time at my grandparents' farm. I got along great with my sister, she is two years older than me. Because of these great memories, I wanted my own kids to have great memories.

But let me back up a bit. My hubby always shakes his head when I say I had a good childhood because by the time I was a teenager, my parents had already divorced. Before they got divorced, I was so unhappy and uneasy with all the fighting. I remember my sister and I would clean the house, make an elaborate dinner and try to get my parents to have a 'romantic' dinner together. The fighting continued. We were told to pretend nothing was wrong when we went to visit relatives. No wonder I hate pretending to this day. I couldn't stand it, so when my parents divorced, I was actually relieved. Silence.

Okay, almost too much silence. My sister didn't take the divorce as well as I did. She needed some treatment so the attention went to her getting better. Once she got better, my mom went into trying to win my father back mode. My father ended up getting remarried to someone else. Then my mom spent a lot of time spending time with her friends. I don't think I minded, I spent all my time at my friend's house and also my boyfriend's house, my now husband. The times I did mind were the times I was forced to go out with my mom and her friends, really, I'm a young teenager, do I really want to spend time with all adults, no! I remember having some knock down drag out fights with her regarding this. I didn't know any of the adults so why should I have to spend time with all of them? Then I was forced to change churches because my mom didn't feel comfortable attending the church I grew up in. I was so angry at this change! I had friends at the church and was actually involved in the youth group, now I had to leave it all behind because she was uncomfortable being a divorced mother.

I went thru my high school years feeling like I was doing it all on my own. When I made drill team, no one was home, just me so no excitement around me except for the girls that picked me up. My mom didn't even know I made the team until I came home later that night. Remember, we didn't have cell phones back then and why would I even bother to call since no one was home anyway.

I had been babysitting since I was young with jobs here and there to pay for everything. During the summers, I wanted a job that would really take me away from it all. One job, I wanted to work on a cruise ship, my mom said no. Another summer I wanted to work as a nanny and found a job for a family on the east coast, my mom said no so I had my friend take the job instead. It ended up the family was the Coach Pitino family. I ended up cleaning hotel rooms and cleaning houses, glamorous huh.

Instead of going to college, I wanted to join the Peace Corp. My mom said no. I went to college. By this time, my sister had moved to California with a guy she had met. My freshman class load was tough with chemistry and right before finals, my mom called to tell me my father had passed away.